Blondie's Bitch Slap

Life is what happens while you're making other plans said John Lennon in his song, Beautiful Boy. All it takes is one bad mammogram to hammer home this truth!

I love going for my annual mammogram because it's always been negative and I could feel, for one more year, that I'd cheated my genetic heritage. So this year I went with my usual let's do it attitude, because I had many other things on my to do list. Yes that was been, past tense! For now and evermore mammogram day will be vastly different for me.

The good news is that in my case the system worked. On Monday the mammo folks called and said they wanted more pictures of my left girl, so my BFF Princess Di said you can't go alone and came with me. The radiologist was there and pointed out to me a funny tiny spot...and said get an ultrasound. So Friday August 31 I went for an ultrasound...Dr. B., the lady radiologist, spoke to me with that deer in the headlights thank god I'm not you this is bad news look on her face...you need a biopsy! This is a mass, says Dr. B, whatever it is--it needs to come out, but don't worry about it over the weekend! Like I couldn't not worry?! So I walk out to my car and call my primary care doc, and she was in. Dr. G. says, well one step at a time, yadda yadda, and I say whatever it is, it needs to come out. I called and left messages with my sister, gal pals and BFFs, and I drive home in stunned shock. At that point I just knew in my bones, it was not nothing...it was going to be very bad news. A karmic bitch slap by my maternal family tree--reaching out of the grave to put a period on my mortality! Thank god for the healing power of martinis & BFFs, I got through the weekend to Wednesday when the biopsy was to be done at 9:00 am. Mostly I got through the weekend by strapping on my Ipod and heading up the bike path for 10 miles or so. I only wanted to walk, and walk and walk. Somehow moving along at blondie speed listening to a novel or a song kept me sane, kept me feeling in control of some part of my body and life.

I wanted to get outside and walk and walk and walk some more. On Wednesday after the biopsy I walked 10 miles, on Thursday I walked 7, and on Friday I walked 6 after I got the call from Dr. G. that yes it is my worst nightmare, Invasive Ductal Carcinoma less than 2Cm and the biopsied lymph nodes were clear, finally the hint of some good news.

What do you do with your gal pals? Drink coffee or martinis? Check out T.J.Maxx bargains? Well I've one upped you there! My BFF Princess Di and I are doing the breast thing together. We're the breast cancer twins of Belmont! Amazingly, a week before me...her highness was diagnosed with breast cancer! Now I must confess here to being a competitive kinda gal (especially when playing Trivial Pursuit) but I never wanted to play this game and win!

Life works in mysterious ways and Di had already lined up all the best Jewish breast cancer docs in Boston. After all, I joined the tribe to avoid buying retail and enjoy all the benefits of fine Jewish doctors and if they were cute and had great chest hair well that's just the icing on the cake, right? My HMO couldn't find a surgeon to see me for over almost 2 months! So, I just decided to join Princess Di's medical team and we would traverse this road together. Sisterhood IS powerful!

Dr. K. could see me on the Monday after my biopsy! So there I was in the surgeon's office still in shock but with an X-ray showing my diagnosis! Dr. K. the most un-surgeon-like cutter I've ever met said, as I was sitting down, "don't worry you are going to be fine!" I said my goal was to rock my grand babies in 15 years, and he said no problem. What a dear, sweet guy, with a terrific sense of humor since he guffawed when I told the ketchup-story of my decision to bolt from Felix & the farm so long ago.

More in the next post. . .3 surgeries! He just couldn't keep his hands off my breast, whatz a gal to do?!

"Sometimes Delores, being a bitch is all a woman has!" Steven King, Delores Claiborne.

“I am woman, hear me roar
In numbers too big to ignore;
And I know too much to go back an' pretend.
'Cause I've heard it all before
And I've been down there on the floor
No one's ever gonna keep me down again!

Oh yes, I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain;
Yes, I've paid the price,
But look how much I gained!
If I have to
I can do anything!
I am strong,
I am invincible,
I am woman!”

Viva Espana!

These lovely paintings take you through the last 500 years of women as subjects in paintings. Along with the cello playing it creates a wonderfully serene interlude! Ah...I can't wait to lean back in the tiny little seat on the 6:30 flight to Madrid on Wednesday night and enjoy (I hope) the feeling of readiness! Ready for the meetings, the presentations, and the fun of my annual conference in Barcelona.

I'm flying into Madrid for a 36 hour art seeking interlude. Armed with Balance Bars and bottled water I'll hike from the Prado to the Thyssen-Bornemisa Museum to the Picasso Museo soaking it all up!

So, today is September 22, and its been months since my glorious trip to Spain; I returned to more work than I could imagine, more work than was fair for the doggy days of summer! Good intentions aside, posting to my blog didn't happen. So pretend this is just June 15th, just for a moment and enjoy my trip highlights.

I did just as I said above; I arrived in Madrid, grabbed a cab to my hotel; slept for 45 minutes and headed out the door w/out the balance bars and with a taste for gazpacho! I was just 100 yards or so from the Central Park of Madrid and all those art museos on my list; plus others I wasn't aware of: I was in art heaven!

The Thyssen-Bournemisa had a faboo visiting VanGogh show so I saw that and then wandered around the rest of the mueso, stopping for lunch of, you guessed it, gazpacho and a fruit salad which turned out to be so much more with a cloud of some sweet puffy meringue on top! After a cruise through the gift shop where I dropped mucho euros on postcards I headed off in search of Picasso's Guernica. Arguably, Guernica is the most powerful work Picasso created as it memorializes while simultaneously rages against the wanton bombing of innocents in the village of Guernica and the horrors of the impending German invasion and Franco's Spanish Civil War. This piece sits in it's own room and is immense; in a huge panel that just lost myself in for a long time. It is in its way timeless and dated; timeless because slaughter of innocents continues all over the world; dated because Picasso is so present in the art world today. Nonetheless, its power is undeniable and in your face. It is my favorite sort of art; art that speaks, no screams to the imperative for justice, democracy, and the value of human life.

The next day, I spent hours in the Prado soaking up the Velazquez and Goya paintings. The Goya masterpiece, The Shootings of May Third 1808 was perhaps an inspiration to Picasso as it personifies the horrors of war by it's tight close up on the execution of a bedraggled group of soldiers. I was by this time fairly bedraggled myself from hiking all over Madrid in search of masterpieces. So I grabbed my bags, paid my bill, and jumped on the first class train to Barcelona where my gal pals and conference awaited. More Spain, mas tarde!

Hair Spray: The Metaphor

Oh boy, where's Blondie going with this one? Well it's quite obvious, when Blondie thinks about the qualities of a wicked great hair spray: stickiness, stiffness, long last-ness, and shiny-ness, friends come to mind!

Friday night, my CLM gal pals threw me a cosmo & chardonnay fueled birthday dinner. These gals and I worked together for 5 years over 10 years ago! They were there for Blondie in the good times when I was pregnant and had my super son, or when we scored a huge success with Club G-Med, and the bad--when I was the target of the month for a maniacal boss. We've been friends for almost 17 years! So, is that not sticky? not long lasting? with shining moments of success and support? Spells wicked great hair spray to me! Sometimes, there is a moment when women walk into your life and you know instantly that they'll be there, for always! And all I can say, is Phyll, JR, SM, EW, and AR you'll always will be on my Hair Spray Honor Roll of Fabulous Friends--Best Friends Forever!

On Wednesday, Di & Munya took me to breakfast, and we dished and noshed and drank gallons of coffee kicking off my week of birthday blasts. Gifts were in the mix, too. Amazing how the name of something, in this case wicked bold nail polish, can set a tone. Well how's Women Without Boundaries do for setting a fab birthday tone? And Cherries Jubilee lipstick? What's not celebratory about that? At this stage in my life, everyday is a gift, and so by definition, is every birthday! After racewalking 7 miles Wednesday afternoon, my hubby and son took me to dinner which, after all that hoofing earned me a pomegranate martini! Ahhh, how sublime it was! And bless my hubby, he organized a little birthday cake w/Paulette & Steve back at our house.

For me, life is made most meaningful by my friends! By the steadfast and constant and wonderful support of great, good friends...and while I am thankful for each day, I am most thankful for this! Plus, of course, martinis and hairspray!